I spoke to one of my friends from school the other day. He is one of the few friends from back then, who are still in touch with me. I hadn’t spoken to him in some time. In the course of speaking he said that his marriage is a troubled one. His wife has gone off to her “maiyka”. I heard his tale of woes and told him that even I am sailing in the same boat. I have seen so many marriages fall apart in the past few years. I wonder, what is wrong with us? Why aren’t we able to have marriages like they had in our parent’s time? What is wrong with this generation? I do not have that many close friends, but almost 80 % of the people they know have either been in a bad marriage or have some relative/sibling caught in one.

There are articles in the newspapers that tell of the increasing number of divorce cases in India.  I think more than infidelity, cruelty or anything, it is incompatibility that is making marriages fail. This generation (especially women) is less tolerant of failings and flaws than our parent’s generation. We want things “our way”. Earlier women were submissive and would tolerate a lot of nonsense, just for the sake of their kids and because of society pressures. These days, even women with kids do not think twice before walking out. Maybe the mindset has changed. Maybe the women have become more liberated and men are still trapped in the dark ages.

Whatever the reason/s may be, the end result is that marriages are breaking down. Which means families is breaking down. All said and done, marriage does have its virtues. We humans are not made to be alone. “No man is a island”. Having a happy married life and family is truly a blessing.  I think a happy marriage takes a lot of hard work. But it is definitely worth it. There is nothing better than having a loving family to come back to. For those of us who have had bad marriages, maybe it is a case of “once bitten, twice shy”. I personally feel that I have been emotionally damaged because of this. I wonder if I could ever be the same happy-go-lucky person I was before this marriage. Many like me would think that we are better off being single.

Another thing that made me jot this post was the movie “War of the Roses”. This is an old movie, released in 1989. I remember the last scene of this movie. I must have watched this movie while I was still in school or something. This movie is about a couple in the throes of divorce. It is a dark comedy. The idea of a couple fighting over who will get to keep the house, made me watch this film. Michael Douglas is younger and dashing as ever. Kathleen Turner is not bad either. The things they do is sometimes over the top, but hilarious all the same. The last scene is what really got me. I wont reveal what it was and spoil it.  It does get you thinking. Although this couple seemed to have everything, they still were unhappy with each other. At least the wife was. So much so that she wished her husband was dead, so she could be free. It is scary, really!

In the end, all I can say is that the husband-wife relation is probably the most complicated relationship ever. What makes a couple click, what makes another break-up….Ram jaane.But ,broken marriage definitely seems to be the disease of this generation.